The psychedelic experience of mushrooms was a game-changer. I woke up the following morning feeling that life had altered. I suppose psychedelic experiences do that to everyone to greater or lesser degrees.
Now that punk was mainstream, and everyone was riding that bandwagon, I opted out of it. Overnight.
I’d not shaved my armpits for a couple of years, a decision that seemed punk at the time but ‘unfeminine’. That was the idea, of course. I did, however, shave my legs all through my punk phase. I grew out my mohican and went back to long hair I had at school.
My mother was pleased ‘to have me back’. The period of grieving for my Dad was over and with it most of my wild (punk outrage) excesses.
I’m sure my mother had an inkling that I was no longer the virgin child she’d known prior, but I’m equally certain she had no idea quite how much cock I’d sucked and fucked in that insane two year period.
I re-embraced my feminine.
Punk felt like old hat anyway, like it was dead. Time to reinvent.
And so I did.
I was immediately moving in different circles, more ‘normal’ circles. Yes, I understand that so far there’s been nothing peculiarly ‘libertine’ about my life, other than having quite a bit of sex with a large number of men, and that doesn’t mark me out from a fair percentage of today’s women.
The average number of sex partners people in the UK have had is around 10.
Women in my age group have had around 7.
By the time I’ve reinvented myself away from the whole easy-sex punk thing my number would have been somewhere in the upper 40s.
In that regard, I’m more ‘libertine’ (or promiscuous, or a slut, notice how these labels are never applied to men?) than most. And yes, a lot of it was just casual sex for its own sake.
I was never one who gauged by the number of partners anyway. Let’s assume I had 50 partners by the age 20, all of them being one night stands (I never fucked the same cock twice in those years)….I’ve had sex 50 times, right? Multiply that by 6 inches per time, and I’ve had 25 foot of cock.
So if I’d found a boyfriend aged 17, gone out twice a week with him, and we’d fucked every Wednesday and Saturday night, I’d have had 156 foot of cock in me.
Who’s the slut? Who’s the promiscuous one taking cock as often as she can?
The difference is that I’ve already experienced different types of cock by age 20, cut, uncut, huge, small, chubby, and had a yardstick by which to gauge preference in future. Of course it’s not all about the cock. The fella attached to it plays a key role in the level of satisfaction involved. A lot of my sex until now was a guy offloading his jizz and either rolling over and going to sleep or getting dressed and scramming. And scramming in the morning anyway.
I didn’t want a relationship with any of them. I just wanted a cock in me to give me as much satisfaction as they were getting. And this learning curve, where I’d worked this out by age 20, put me ahead of the other women out there.
Guys would come and chat me up once I got into a more conventional dating/socialising scene. The punks didn’t do that. ‘Let’s fuck’ would have been considered romance/foreplay in the punk days. And if he was half way cute, or I was horny, we’d fuck. I knew there was no relationship intent (although many punks did pair off into conventional relationships).
For all their bravado, though, many were sexually inexperienced. I’m pretty sure I took the virginity of at least double figures of teenage guys back then, judging from how quickly they shot their load (or sometimes by confession).
Of all the guys I’ve blown, I’m pretty sure 20 and more would have been the figure of those getting a proper blowjob for the first time, and amazed that I’d gulp and swallow, or willingly accept a hot load on my face, my tits or wherever. I’m sure I spoiled it for a lot of girls out there because fellas expected my ability to guzzle cum down as the norm, when we know that’s not the case for most women.
Anyway, by age 20 I’d have fucked around 45 guys. And certainly blown (and swallowed) a larger number. Of course there was a bit of a crossover, some guys got a fuck and a blowjob out of me, but sometimes a blowjob was what both of us wanted, rather than a fuck. Put it this way. By age 20 I’d had around 100 cocks in my hand. Their destination -fanny or mouth- after that was a matter of negotiation. But easily 100 cocks in my hand. And of all of those, finishing a guy off with a hand job was a rarity. It seemed like a waste of cum to me.